Out Loud...

There are times in my life that all I want to do is to disappear from the face of this planet. For no reason at all. I just want to escape… from what? I just want to escape from myself.

Basically, I created this blog to tell people (whether they are just passers-by or friends or enemies) what happens to my so-called life. I want to share things to them as if the readers are seeing the places through my eyes, and learning life lessons through my experiences. I'm not quite sure I have been eloquent enough to meet those objectives.

But in this entry, I want to pour out some of the emotions, the strongest so far. Last January 25, in the wee hours of morning, at the corner of EDSA and Shaw Boulevard the talk started. I was a bit hesitant then, but as the conversation digs deeper to the heart of the matter, I started to unleash all the things I so long to say. For the first time in my life, I said things how it should be said, without censoring the words, without thinking what might be the outcome of my actions, without caring if those words I uttered will lose the person in front of me faster than a speed of light. It didn’t matter. It feels like it’s my only chance to admit everything to this person, and holding back is not an option. I cried through out our talk. I cursed every once in a while. I considered his arguments. And then, I found myself in great pain… up until now that I compose this entry.

Although tear stricken when I walk steadily away from him, I’m relieved from the emotions I so try hard to conceal. Finally, I’ve said my piece and so is he. There’s nothing more to do but choose. I was left with two options, two options that I will both lose. Two options which have no deadline. Only two options… Let Go or Stay…

Feel Light...

This is just a simple entry.

I feel so light today, I don't know why. I dreamt of my bestfriend (who's now based in Singapore). She told me "wag kang masyadong malungkot" then, I woke up feeling this lightness. Ü I feel still pretty and to think that it's 8pm already and nothing bad has happened to ruin my day yet. It feels good to appreciate the positive side of life. I wish this will last longer. I hope that life's reality will not pour down on me yet.

Why hate when you can love?
Why cry when there's so much to smile about?

its been a long time...

Happy New Year...

Many things have already happened since my last post here. And lately, I don't know why, but I can't seem to find time to post here. What's keeping me busy? hmmm...

a. My Scrapbook. This scrapbook contains most of the climbs and places I've been to last year. This will showcase my skill in photography and my pretty face (hahaha...) To all who wishes to see this scrapbook may find it a little boring... but who cares about what others may think, what's important is I'm happy while doing this scrapbook.
b. Updating My Diary. I am updating my diary. Right now, I am maintaining two diaries. One is the 2004 (October was my last entry) and My Starbucks diary for 2005.
c. WORK!!! yes, some of my closest friends may find it extraordinary that what's keeping me busy is WORK. Oh well, I can't do anything about this. I just have to work...
d. OCMI. There are some activities I am doing as an OCMIzen. We have upcoming open climbs that we need to prepare for. And the assignment Panget and I have for the OCMF website.

Basically, that's it. Of course, I did not include thinking random thoughts for that's already given.

Just wanna share: I have found a new friend in Gil. My officemate who lives 3 subdivisions away from me. Lately, he is my constant companion/bus mate/team mate/mentor.

Right now, I've just started reading a book. Have Baby, Will Date of Summit Books. It is just for light reading. =)

Anyways, until next post... when? that I'm not yet sure...